Tuesday, March 10, 2015

Op-Ed Round-Up, Mass Killers Edition

In honor of Dick Cheney’s recent op-ed piece on Iraq, and because I know you’re all busy and there’s so much to read out there I’m offering a round up of four other editorial voices heard around the world in recent weeks. There’s nothing like a self-serving screed by a legendary amoral monster, mass killer or war criminal to lighten the mood over coffee and croissants!
Heinrich Himmler
Writing in Der Speigel
The gist:
Apparently Jew were really bad. They had horns and stuff. And Hitler was a lovely man, mistreated by history. “Arbeit Mach Frei” – words to live by! New developments in Europe give him hope.
Writing in El Coreo
The Gist:
The Inquisition was necessary and effective – and a lot of fun. It should be brought back promptly, especially considering the new lax and subversive tone from the Vatican. “Call me old school,” he says. “But nothing beats a good torture session to help a heathen see the light.”
Pol Pot
The Gist:
Writing in the Rasmei Kampuchea Daily
“I just don’t like people who disagree with me!”
Vlad the Impaler
Writing in the Transylvaniq Times
The Gist:
He wants to set the record straight. He was a beloved ruler and even a folk hero in Romania. People wanted to stay on his good side! As for all that impaling, He only impaled people when they deserved it. “Fair is fair.”

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